Current mood: Inspired ☺

I slept amazingly well last night. Well, I often seem to do after certain activities... I do not want to go into too much detail, but I can tell you one thing hubby said: "Did it feel different with someone on their thirties?" ROFL I didn't dare to remind him that i have been with a 30-something before; I just told him the truth: "You've always been the best". I also saw the new movie version of FAME last night, and watching movies like that always inspirises me. :) So now I'm feeling like I want to do something creative. I happened to watch a bit from a Finnish decorating show this morning and now I've got this layout/decorating plan in my head that I need to get drawn down. I also would like to get some writing done...

Past few days I've been wondering if I should blog about saturday. Anyone who happens to glare at my abusive FB posting, knows that we celebrated J's birthday. And that I over did it. *blushes to thousand shades of red* I didn't drink that much while the kids were still up. I have a rule about not drinking in front of the kids, but I'm the only one honoring that rule. I hated it that we couldn't (again) get them to have a sleepover somewhere, but what's there to do when everyone we know, were here celebrating. I must say, I'm not hugely freaked out about J's family and friends drinking while kids are around. They can behave, drunk or not. The same can't be said about my own extended family. And for the first time in my life, saturday was the night that I was drunk like that. I'm so embarressed I could dig a hole all the way to China just to get away from facing some people...

Midnight was the point of no return. The point when J's brother and friend thought it would be funny to make me a little drunk so I'd talk more and step out of my observing state. Of course, they didn't know it was my "observing state"; they just said things like "Speak up! You're just sitting alone in the corner" when I was infact just two feet away from them and trying to keep up with the conversation. I realy like writing and communicating thru writing, but when it comes to socialicing in 'real life'; I'm very, very shy. I might still be an ok-chatter 1-on-1, but when there's a group of people and everyone is talking at once; I really am not comfortable stepping in and say what ever I might be thinking. For one, I might accidentally interrupt someone else's talking and I'd hate to be that rude. Second, I really like the silent observor-role when I don't need to take sides (if there's such a discussion going on) and I can just see how different kind of people communicate together; what little conflicts that can cause and how they solve the situations. I get kicks out of it, as some may say. I must say, this serves well my new hobby, writing. And because of my writing, I've become more intensive with the observing. I even observe and analyze TV shows and movies I see; and now days I get much more from them as I used to.

So, I drank a little too much wine. I thought I could handle it because I was also drinking a lot of water. It's my drinking technique; if I'm in a social event that calls for me to drink, I drink every 2nd or 3rd drink water so I won't get too wasted. Also, alcohol dehydrates and hangover is mostly just a very dehydrated state. But saturday was also the first time ever that I drank that much wine. Maybe like 5th time ever that I drank wine at all. I guess I'll still have to find my limits with that one. I don't usually get drunk very easily and that's how it felt like on saturday too, at first. Then sometime around 1am, all the sudden I went from 'sober' to 'wasted'. I do not like being wasted. I do not like the person I'm like these days when I'm wasted. I turn out to be a little bit flirty, loud and pushy. Like I'm seeking for attention. Which is funny because all the horoscopes say that's what Aquarius is like. The hell it is! At least I don't want to be like that. I'm perfectly content being the little unsocial creature that I am...

There were two age groups in our party (three if you count the kids); the 20-somethings and the middle-aged. For me it's a little peculiar that my hubby, his siblings and cousins are so much at eaze with drinking and socaliazing with their parents, aunts and uncles. My own family is the kind that is always embarressed about the other generation's behavior. But I guess it's just another thing related to the fact how differently the two families act when abusing alcohol... Anyways, around 10pm (when I was still sober and kids were up) there was a little moment that could have made me more relaxed and conversational if I wouldn't have to step out of the situation just when it was going well. Most of us 20-somethings were sitting in the kitchen area talking, when we heard the kids in our bedroom (out of limits for them), and I could hear that they had made the shiatsu-massaging thing crawl on the floor. I said "oh, they found the massage thing" because I knew J's friends H & T would make a joke out of it. So they started suggesting it was some other kind of massage thing (you know what I mean. you're dirty minded enough). Normally I'm too shy to come with a comeback for that and just get embarressed, but I wanted to be more social so I just wiggled my eyebrows in a suggestive manner (because I can't wink). They laughed and I relaxed and it would have lead to a good conversation... but then I had to go wash some little person's butt and the moment was gone when I got back. So, when the last kid fell asleep and people started suggesting that I should drink to relax some more, I was kinda co-operative. I was tired of being the odd ball and that everyone kept telling me to speak more.

Afterwards I did talk more, I think I was social enough. I might have even been the dominant part of the group when there was just a little group left: me, J, his brother JAT, friend T and J's cousin M. i was the only woman. I over did it, the talking. I had a comment for everything. I even pimped out my friends to J's brother JAT and their cousin M. Paula to JAT because Paula had seen a picture of him and liked him. I ended up showing Paula's picture from FB and JAT was super excited. He even started talking with Paula on MSN. And then they had the camera and mic on when I was utterly wasted and made a fool out of myself. I wanted to talk to Paula but i couldn't hear her properly because the speakers don't work well with my ears... I was super duper embarrasing, chasing everyone else but JAT off the computer because I didn't want them to tease Paula. They wanted to see her bikini-pics... Well, I wouldn't let them objectify her like that so I kept pushing them away and saying things like "nobody tease my Paula". I think i'm busted. Now they know how Paula-addicted I am... The morning after Paula told me I looked pissed in the cam. At which point I cursed like a true ofspring of an arctic Finn.

I ended up having (my first ever) two day hangover. Well, I didn't throw up and the headache passed sunday morning after just one painkiller. Even though I drank about a litre worth of water with the wine, I was seriously dehydrated. Sunday, I drank another litre of water and never needed to use the toilet. On monday I was still very thirsty and had that mildly-hang over feeling going on. Icky! I'll never drink more than two glasses of wine at once, again!